April Fools' joke: Use Less campaign coming to LCCC

Beginning today, the LCCC Dining Hall will no longer provide utensils to students during any meal service.

Called the “Use Less” program, General Manager of Campus Food Services Justin Dreslinski estimates that the water saved will be enough to fill the swimming pool in the Physical Education Building.

During the next few weeks, large pipes and mechanical systems will be installed across campus lawns and walkways to run the saved water from sinks and faucets in the dining hall directly into the pool.

The Use Less idea will also incorporate plateless Wednesdays and no-beverage Fridays.

Golden Eagle students have mixed reactions to the news.

“Who cares?” said one student, who left without giving his name.

A female general studies student had a different reaction: “They don’t provide proper salad forks anyway, so this forking campaign is probably the right way to go.”
The Use Less plan also anticipates turning water fountains around campus into mini-xeriscaped gardens, as well as removing all water from restrooms at the college.